Home

Have you ever heard that you can never go home? I had heard that over and over all my life and never really believed it. Then my mother died and the house was sold. That had been "home" to me for a very long time even though I had a home of my own when I married and had a family. Then I divorced and moved to Colorado and that became home
Have you ever heard that you can't ever go home once you've moved from where you grew up? I had been told that all my life and I never really believed it because no matter what # husband I was on and where I was living, home was always where my mother lived. When my mother died and the house was sold, I was lost for a while, but realized that "home" would probably be the land I own in Attica, N.Y. and where Marty and I are camping for a week or two. My children and grandchildren have gotten together there from time to time over the years. It used to be a tradition that as many as possible would join there in July for Thanksgiving in July and camp, fix a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner over the fire and Mykyl would fix two turkeys on grills. We'd camp and walk the stream, sit around a campfire at night, watch the fireflies and tell stories, (some of which would be just TMI for my delicate and sophisticated brain ((:O) .) That was a wonderful time and it felt comfortable to call Meadowbrook "home". Now the family doesn't gather there due to some truly sad and unfortunate circumstances in the family that has pulled us apart. When I go there now, Mykyl will often come to camp and sit around the fire and talk and that is a wonderful thing, because I don't often get a chance to see her outside of SL.

This year as I drive around the area with Marty, showing her some of my old haunts, I'm realizing how different it is here now. It's been raining since we got here and it reminds me of a summer a few years ago that I camped at Meadowbrook for 5 months while trying to sort out my life. Somehow it seems like this is a year of letting go and it's rather mysterious, causing some anxiety and sorrow, yet seems so right. I just don't know what I'm being led to letting go of yet, but life moves on. As I've gotten older I realize how much I've let go of that's made my life a much more fulfilling one. Home now is where my soul mate lives as well as the world and universe at large, and finally wherever I go once I am composed of the life force I came here with, minus a body that doesn't much please me any more. And I realize that it's all good. As the years pass now, I feel free to make mistakes, to act silly/childish, to love and be loved by a woman who is so far beyond me in growth, understanding and wisdom that I feel blessed every moment of my life.

So I AM always home, especially when Marty is with me also. Life is a never ending unfolding of opportunity for growth, for joy, for sadness - sometimes bordering on deep depression (which is also a place of growth). I feel the emotions of others and understand their pain at a deeper level than I did as a full-time therapist. I find myself reaching out to others without knowing why except that I care so much for the health (mental and physical) of others, of Mother Nature, of the universe at large. I am so committed to my part in that health and welfare that I find myself doing things at times that I would never have thought of doing because I was so wrapped in my own world and my own issues that I thought were so much more important, or in worse need than anyone else's. This is a good time in my life, even though I know Mykyl and others in my family, the RLs of SL people are not in such great places. SL is home for me also and I offer myself, my wisdom, my experience, my heart and healing to anyone there who would reach out.

I AM HOME AND I CONTINUE TO LEARN MORE AND MORE ABOUT WHAT THAT MEANS.

Make a wonderful day and life for yourself and welcome to my home.

Nemaste my friends.

Dulcinea